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Last week my hubby and I went on an overnight trip to a local casino for his birthday.  When we got home, on Friday, I found my 15-year-old male Chihuahua Speedy lying in his favorite spot and he had passed. He took his trip over the Rainbow Bridge as they say. He was an old dog, had always been very thin, but seemed to be in good health. We knew any dog at that age it was inevitable that time was running short, but it was a shock. Now almost a week later I still look for him. He used to sleep right up next to me at night and now I wake up wondering where he is and then it hits me, he’s gone. Unless you have had an animal you truly loved, I don’t think a person can understand how bad it hurts. Some people look at dogs or other animals as something that is in this world but couldn’t really care less what happens to them. You have those people who can’t understand why people love their pets so or how they can say that they love the pets more than people. I guess it is weird that you could love a furry friend more than a human, but it is true. A dog loves you no matter what. They love you when you are hurting. They love you no matter how you treat them, but if you love them, they will more than reciprocate that feeling. How can you not have love for a pet that has sat in your lap or slept with you for years? A pet acts excited to see you whether you have just been in the other room or gone for a week, they still can’t wait to jump in your lap and say hello. This little animal can tell when your sad or happy and they act accordingly. Unless you have loved a pet, you just don’t understand.

I was going to write my farewell to Speedy last week right after it happened, but I just couldn’t bring myself to it. Speedy was born to our female Lady who passed two years ago to cancer. I was there when he was born. I made sure she was able to take care of him and then we watched him grow into an adult. At the time, we were raising and selling puppies and he was my stud, which is how he got the name Speedy. When he was a puppy it was because he was fast, but as an adult, he knew when the girls were in heat before I did. For some reason, though, he was always a thin dog. I told him he sure didn’t belong in our family because none of us were thin, but any vet I took him to told us it was just his metabolism. Even after his stud days were gone the weight never did come, but he was a happy dog. He was an affection hog and would knock the other dogs out of his way to make sure he got our attention.

Now we only have one of our original Chihuahuas left and that is “zombie dog” Sassy. She will be 13 this year, is blind and toothless, so we will just continue to love on her until her day comes. Who knows, she could live to be 16, you just never know.

For those of you who have lost your furry friend, I can feel your pain. We can take solace in know that they have crossed the Rainbow Bridge and are now playing with their friends that went before them over fields of grass and pools of water, living out their lives with no pain. All I can hope is when the day comes for me to go home that they will be there waiting for me… R.I.P. little buddy Speedy… Until next time…


ImageThirteen years ago this month my husband and I were driving down the road toward Granbury, Texas, and saw a lady selling Chihuahua puppies.  I said I wanted to go and hubbie wasn’t thrilled, but said okay.  On that day I bought this little brown and tan Chihuahua that I named Lady and she was with us until today.  She brought us years of love, laughs, and litters of puppies that went to wonderful homes, but today her life came to an end.  A few months ago we were told she had cancer.  It was a mass near the bowels and would eventually get big enough to cause her not to be able to have a bowel movement.  About a month after that I noticed what looked like pebbles under the skin of her mammary glands, which meant she now had mammary cancer.  She was doing okay up until this week.  Well, I guess I should back up and give a little history.  After the vet told us she had cancer, we decided that treatment for this type of cancer was only palliative and really would not make a difference.  I made a promise to Lady that day that she would not have to suffer.  When the day came that I knew she was miserable and the time was right I would take her to the vet and let them put her to sleep.  That day came today.  I had wondered for the past couple of months when I would know it was time.  I mean you don’t want to do it too early, and cut her life too short, but then you also do not want to wait so long that the poor thing is suffering, but it ends up I knew when it was time.  I could tell that if we waited any longer I would break my promise to Lady, which I had no intention of doing.

I have to admit I spent most of the day crying, which some people may find weird, as it was just a “dog,” but what some people don’t understand is a pet can be closer than your own children or blood relatives.  They give you unconditional love no matter what you do to them.  I wasn’t the greatest pet mamma, but I made sure she had a full tummy, a nice place to sleep, and got lots of love.  She always met me at the door when I came home, had to sleep with me at night, and when I had a migraine or was hurting she would come and cuddle with me in bed, how many relatives and friends show a person that much love other than a spouse or possibly a child?  The difference is you pet for the most part will not talk back, will be completely loyal, and be happy for whatever attention you show them.  The thing is our pets have a way of taking a piece of our heart when they go to the “Rainbow Bridge” and those who do not have a special pet will never understand.

Lady will definitely be in our hears and minds for years to come.  I have two of her children still with me, Speedy and Sassy (my little 2 pound girl my businesses are named after), so we aren’t left alone, but it will just never be the same.  I am so glad I stopped and bought her 13 years ago, as I am sure my life would not have been the same without her.  We love you Lady and know you are in a better place with no pain chasing squirrels through the fields.  Till next time…

ImageTwo weeks ago my dog Lady wasn’t feeling well.  She is a pure-breed Chihuahua who has a brown and tan teddy bear face.  I thought she was just constipated or such and figured a quick visit to the vet would make everything okay.  Ends up she has a mass in her bowel area and it is probably cancer.  The vet basically said we could spend thousands of dollars to treat it, but it really would not extend her life that long.  I asked the vet the big question though and really did not get an answer.  The question is when is it time to put her to sleep?  She cannot talk.  She cannot really communicate, so when is it time?  Do we wait until we can tell she is in horrible pain, which I really don’t want her to live that way, or do you just say you do not have much time so let us do it now before you get that bad. 

It makes me feel like I am playing God with my dog.  It is my decision on when, if, or how long she will be on the earth.  I have had her since she was six weeks old.  She has always been a house dog, sleeping with us, and adding something special to our lives, but at what point do I know and have peace with the decision that it is time to let her go? 

I guess what I find crazy is that we can decide when life ends for our pets, but we cannot do this for ourselves or our loved ones.  People can tell us what is wrong, how much pain they are in, and if they are ready to leave this earth, but we cannot legally do anything to help them end their life.  It just seems like as long as a person is of sound mind they should be able to make the same decision of whether they have to stay on this earth or not.

Back to Lady, we see the vet again tomorrow and see what they think and where we go from here.  Since I opted out of spending thousands of dollars I don’t have to try to extend her life a couple of months, it is going to be hard for them to give me a definitive answer, but maybe they can help me to make the right decision when the time comes.  I do hope there is really a Rainbow Bridge where our pets go when their time is over so we can see them again… till next time…

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