You are currently browsing the category archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ category.

IMAG0744I have a little two-pound chihuahua who will be 13 years old in May 2018. She is a little bugger with white fur and a few brown spots, most notably is the spot that looks like an upside down heart on her back. She is a feisty little thing who apparently has small dog syndrome because she thinks she is a pit bull.  She takes on other dogs no matter how large they are.  This the reason I rarely take her out of the house. It is also the reason I had to make a tiny little muzzle for her.  For some reason, people see her and think she is so cute and little that they have to pet her, but I never know when her bad side is going to come out, so better safe than sorry. I have to admit we get some crazy looks from people when they go to pet her and then see the muzzle, they pull their hand back in midair and say what? That is when I have to go into my speech that I never know who she is going to like or not, so it is for your own protection, which is kind of sad, but true.

Sadly though, about three months ago I realized she had in a very short time gone completely blind. Her eyes that used to glow red in a certain light now look like white clouded over circles. I jokingly say she has become a zombie, as she has no teeth and now has these zombie’s eyes. It is kind of creepy. She seems to be doing well though. I had someone ask if I was going to put her down because of her blindness and I said no because I was going to wait and see how she got along, if she was able to adapt, and if she still had a good quality of life. The thing is, she is actually doing quite well. What helps is we have lived in the same house for the past almost 13 years, so she basically grew up here. The first couple of weeks were rough. She walked until she ran into something, bounces off and then goes a different direction until she ran into something else, and off she would go. As long as no doors are open that she isn’t used to she can make from the bedroom to the kitchen and back fairly well. I have thought about getting her a helmet as she really does hit hard sometimes, but I really think she would spend more time trying to get the helmet off than doing anything else. She has her path and as long as it is free of any obstacles she is fine.

What still bugs me though is her eyes. I guess I have seen too many zombie movies, but I really think she looks like a zombie dog. The writer in me keeps trying to figure out how to fit her into a story. She could be a zombie hunter, who can sniff out others like herself. She could also be an evil dog that bites people’s ankles and turns them into zombies. Maybe they ought to use her on the Walking Dead as one of the character’s dogs, or even the show Freakish, she really would make a very interesting new character. Just think about it, here is this little two-pound miniature dog who growls at everything, thinks she is 100 pounds, hangs off pit bull neck skin swinging back and forth, then add the zombie eyes to the mix, and there you go. She would probably be one of the most interesting characters on TV right now. She would then try to melt hearts by sitting all prim and proper with her front little paws crossed looking really pitiful to where she can get whatever she wants. I wonder if she is smarter than we think and is just playing us all with her pitiful self to get all the attention she can grab. Hmmm, I bet she is currently thinking of ways to make me feel bad so I will give her a snack… Little smarty butt… Until next time…

Advertisements

new-year-2841115_960_720

It is that time of the year again… time to say goodbye to the old year and bring in the new. 2017 is finally over. It wasn’t a horrible year, but it definitely had its ups and downs. I’m not the only person who seems to feel this way. I have heard many people say they are so glad this year is over. Time for something new. A new year to try to do what we didn’t get accomplished the year before. I do hope 2018 is better than 2017. Don’t get me wrong, there were a lot of good things that happened this year. We went on our anniversary cruise in November. I finally left my profession of medical transcription after 17 years, which that was something I probably should have done way before I did. I was able to land a job as a customer service rep for a great company that I can also work from home for. That was the main reason I stayed at medical transcription so long is it was one of those jobs where most of us worked from home. Problem is pay had gotten so low I was barely able to make minimum wage and I knew I had to make a change. Yes, I have to deal with some very upset customers, but there are some really nice people also. Plus, I have four weeks of vacation per year that they make sure you take. I’ve never worked anywhere that they encouraged you to take time off. In our departmental meetings, we are told to make sure we don’t forget to use our vacation, it is just weird. I was an independent contractor for over 10 years, so vacations, benefits, etc. were not in my vocabulary. I’m still trying to get used to it.

As far as the rest of the year, we had some family problems that are still needing to be worked through, but that is nothing new for this group. There were also the health issues, but those have been a part of our lives for quite a while. I’m not really sure how I really feel about a new year, but you can’t stop time and you either learn to accept that or live in a delusional world all your own. But, what is really important, is to make a plan so 2018 doesn’t pass by and then on December 31, 2018, we aren’t sitting here wondering where the time went and looking at all the things we didn’t get accomplished.

I am doing something a little different this year. I have ordered a 2018 Law of Abundance planner. This is one of those planners that start with you figuring out exactly what you want to accomplish in the upcoming year. You write down your plans, why you want to accomplish them and how you are going to accomplish them. Once you have set out your short and long-term goals you then make a plan to accomplish them. A roadmap for the year that you can follow, rewrite as needed, and then make weekly and monthly assessments and readjustments to make sure you still want to continue on that path or if it needs to break off into a different goal. As they say, if you don’t plan, you are planning to fail, or something like that. I know this is important for me, as I have so much I want to do that I get overwhelmed and end up doing nothing, which then frustrates me and then I just want to give up. I have always admired those people who know exactly what they want to do. They have known since they were little kids what they were going to become and then they persisted until their dreams came true. Now I know some of those people ended up never achieving success and then had no idea what to do with their life after that, as they had no plan B. But, sometimes I think it is good to not have a plan B, C, or D. If you have nothing else you can do or want to do then you have to keep persisting until something happens.

When you are a person who wants to do a lot of things or is good at several different things, then if one thing doesn’t work you go to the next. The problem with this is that mindset gives you an out. Oh, this didn’t work out, well I will just move on to this other path, or you have all these different things going on at once and wonder why you have nothing finished, just a bunch of half done projects. Once you sit down to see what stage everything is in you want to give up as there is so much undone it can overwhelm you. That is where I end up a lot. One of those situations where you see all this stuff, you organize all of it, you plan it all out, but finally, you see you have nothing complete, nothing is working like it should, so you just stop as you have no idea of what you should even be doing. That is why this year I am starting a planner, a roadmap to what my most important goals are, why I want to accomplish them, and then reasonable steps to achieve them. I would suggest to you that if you are wanting to truly make 2018 the year that you see your dreams coming true or that book finally written or whatever you have been wanting to do that you get you a good planner, one that works for you, and then take the time daily, weekly, monthly to set up what needs to be done and then follow your plan. If you get sidetracked don’t worry about it. Acknowledge it and move on.

Find a plan, method, or something that will help you setup 2018 to be the best year yet – the year you finally make progress towards your dreams. Until next time…

It has been a while since my last post I must admit.  For some reasangelandbirdnewon, this blog hasn’t been as important to me these past few months.  Late in 2016, I renewed my love for photography.  I have been taking pictures for as long I can remember.  When I was about 11 or so I had entered my photographs in the State Fair of Indiana.  I came in reserve best in show because the judges said a person of my age couldn’t have taken pictures that good.  But, after getting married, having kids, it seems as though life just kind of got in the way.  I would take pictures here and there, but they were mostly for my art dolls, purses, and other things I was working on, so taking the pictures was just something that needed to be done, not something I truly enjoyed.

Then I started researching digital cameras, how to sell stock photos, and started looking for my niche, what I find interesting and really wanted to spend time photographing.  After much thought, I realized I am fascinated with gravestones/statues/lost and forgotten things.  I then started my quest to find graveyard angels, the cute but sometimes sad little people who spend their days and nights watching over the dead.  They can be little cherubs sitting on the headstone to life-size angles that are standing over or slumped over the grave.  When you start reading the headstones it can be so interesting.  You begin to wonder what their life was like, why they have the gravestones they have, and who they were, what they liked, and what got them to where they are now.  The most touching are the graves of the young.  The babies who only lived a few hours or the children who spent such a short time on this earth.  You can normally recognize a child’s grave as loved ones will leave toys and other trinkets to keep them company.

Another thing I love to take pictures of would be old and abandoned buildings.  I wish I was younger, as at this age being able to climb in through windows and running away from the scene is just really out of my physical ability.  Urban exploring as a photographer lends itself to such interesting photos.  I do though find older buildings, abandoned cars, and other forgotten things to photograph.  There is really such beauty in the ways old things start to decay.  The plants that overtake the structure, the rotting of the wood and how nature takes back the abandoned.  These forgotten places make a person wonder why are they in this shape, what were the people who lived there like, why did they leave, and will the place ever be a usable building again?

If you are curious about what I’ve been taking pictures of check me out at michellelord.com.   You can even buy a print…  Is there something you used to like to do but haven’t in a while?  Something you have always wanted to try?  Well, you aren’t getting any younger so you might as well take the time and get to it.  Until next time…

 

It really seems like I get longer and longer between my posts to this blog. Not sure why, maybe it is just life getting in the way, but it is probably time to start getting more consistent with this blog thing, as I have a lot to say, just need to put into words.

So, what is my rant today? Not sure. I have thought about a lot of things. How our President is doing in his first 100 days.

I have to admit he isntarget-1551490_640‘t my favorite person, but he has done lot of what he promised, so you have to give him some points on that. I could talk about some congress person  who is trying to pass a bill that certain types of sex is illegal, but my question is how do you know what I am doing in the privacy of my own bedroom? Are you really bugging and filming all Americans and we don’t know it? Kind of makes you think. I could talk about my attempts at growing veggies, and how after two years I think maybe I have figured out how not to do it, so now I just need to stop and try the exact opposite. I mean that would make sense, don’t you think. How about the state that is trying to pass a law where if someone breaks into your house and tries to kill you, but you kill them first, that if he lives he can sue you or if he dies the family can sue you? That has to be one of the stupidest things I have heard in a long time. I have a right to defend myself on my property. The minute you come into my house uninvited or with intent to do me or my family harm, you deserve whatever happens to you and your family doesn’t deserve a dime. What are some of these politicians thinking, or maybe that is the problem, they aren’t.

Maybe I ought to write about how with it now in the month of April, that I am finally making my goals for the year. A little behind you might say. Which, wouldn’t be a lie. I have for the past who knows how many years have said I am going to start writing this year. I am finally going to write short stories, novellas, where ever the characters take me and guess what? I still have nothing to publish. You know why? Because I was doing my goal setting completely wrong. If you make a list of what you are going to do, i.e. lose weight, write a book, get my degree, you are making such vague goals you are never going to accomplish them. I was reading an e-book the other day on how writers need to set goals. One of the main points is you can only make goals that can be done by you and need no outside force to complete. You can’t say, I’m going to 100 books this year, as you are depending on 100 people you don’t know to find your book and buy it, so you just set yourself up to fail. Now you can say I’m going to write 1000 words or 10 pages a day, then you are getting closer. You have given yourself steps to succeed, but you haven’t put anything in place to help you when you mess up and aren’t able to write for a couple of days.

What you really need to do is identify what is taking your time away from your writing or goal. Is it too much social media, too many TV shows, or whatever it is that you find yourself doing instead of writing? I know mine is too much TV. I like my TV. I grew up with the TV. It was my friend, my babysitter, and now if I start a show, I have to know how it ends. If I don’t know how it ends I spend the next four hours figuring out all sorts of alternative endings, where if I had just sat down and finished the show, I wouldn’t be wasting more time doing “what if.” Of course, if I never started the show and went in and started writing, I probably could have gotten at least 1000 words written in an hour or so instead. I also find myself needing to do research on one thing and an hour later I not only didn’t find the answer I needed, I ended up catching up on Facebook, looking up obscure websites on certain maladies, or any other host of different things that have nothing to do what I originally decided to do. Sound familiar to you?

I will admit, I’m far from an expert on how to truly set and finish goals, but I have a lot of experience in what not to do, as I am one heck of a procrastinating, scattered, easily distracted, and completely confused writer, so don’t do as I say, take my example and do the exact opposite… Till next time…

Image result for happy new year 2017Well, Happy New Years…  Here comes 2017, a new year, new possibilities, and will we make the best of it?  It is so hard to believe 2016 is gone.  I’m still sitting here wondering what happened to it.  The holidays were kind of surreal to a point.  I don’t know if it is because both Christmas and New Years were on a Sunday and then the holiday was celebrated on the following Monday just really has me off kilter.  My question is why do we need to take off the Monday when the holiday was already over?  Do people really need to take that day off?  What about us who work a weird schedule and Monday is already our day off?  I do know I was sitting at Christmas lunch with the family and it just didn’t feel like Christmas.  I know I live in Texas and it was in the 70s, and we were sitting outside, but the whole year of 2016 was a bit weird.

What I do know is I need to get my goals in writing for the new year.  I have never believed in resolutions.  Honestly, what is a resolution other than a hope or wish that has no plan?  Most people barely get two weeks into January before they have given up or forgot what their resolution even was.  What we need to do is make goals.  Goals are something you put in writing and then make a plan on how you are going to make them work.  Let’s say you want to lose 40 pounds.  Okay, good goal, but how are you going to do that?  You then make your short, medium and long-term plans on how you will make that happen.  Short term, lose five pounds in one month, medium 20 pounds within six months, and long term is by this time next year you will have lost the weight.  Now, just putting that down on paper is a start, but it still isn’t a goal.  To be a true goal you now need to put down the steps to get there.  Choose your diet, plan your meals, set a certain amount of time each week to exercise, and then you put these steps to the medium and long term goals also.  You should sit and do this type of planning to every goal you have for the new year, whether it be personal, financial, or business.  One thing I did was Google goal planning templates and the search came up with many free or very inexpensive forms to help you figure out how and what you really want to do, and then a plan to make it happen.  A lot of people try to set goals that are too hard to obtain and then when they fail they just give up.  Remember they should not be so simple that you barely have to work obtain the goal, but it shouldn’t be so hard that there is no way to obtain it.  Don’t set yourself up to fail by making goals that are unrealistic.

I know last January I said that 2016 was the year I was going to start writing fiction.  Guess what, I have like five or six different half started books that now I have no idea where I was even going with the story.  I just said it was the year for fiction writing, I didn’t make exact goals to get there.  Exact goals would have been a short story each week, or so many words written per week, or something that I can accomplish that is not dependent on someone else doing something…  The goal needs to be something tangible and related to you and your wants and skill set.

I am currently still working on my goals for the year.  I’m trying to make sure I am setting up goals that I can work towards, a plan for 2017, so on New Year’s day 2018, I’m not sitting in the same place I am today wondering what happened to the past year and why I didn’t get anything accomplished that I had planned to do.  Until next time…

I find myself in a strange situation, or I guess state of mind would be a better term for it.  I’m frustrated with life.  There isn’t just one thing I’m frustrated with, it is several small things that have become one big problem.  I can’t seem to put my finger onImage result for frustrated with life what is wrong, or when it started, but I know it has been coming on for a while.  I’m on my “happy” pills, and they are working, but for some reason not well enough.  Have you ever felt like if one more thing happens you are going to completely lose it?  Not sure what you’re going to lose, but you know it won’t be good.  I’m not one to throw or break things, as that just means I would have to find the money to replace the item, and I just am not wasteful that way.  I’m not a screamer, as throat surgery a few years back makes that painful.  I used to be a crier, but the pills have for the most part stopped that.  There are times when the waterworks would just flow, but now I sit there thinking this situation should really see me being more emotional, but I just don’t feel it.

I did read here a while back that if you take too much Tylenol (I think), that it makes you to where you just don’t care.  You’re not as empathetic as you used to be.  This is probably not a good thing as I take a combination of Tylenol and Aleve several times a day, as I am in chronic pain, and have been for years.  I have fibromyalgia, even though I don’t have a doctor who will give me that diagnosis.  Was told by one doctor that if your record shows fibro the rheumatologist will not see you, which I didn’t think was a good thing.  I mean I’ve never been to a rheumatologist, but if I ever need one, I want to make sure he will see me.  Over the years, I have had 3 car accidents where the other driver rear-ended me with 3 subsequent whiplash injuries, so my neck always hurts plus migraine headaches.  Not to mention, I have arthritis in just about every joint you can have it, so I am in pain, all the time.  Like they say, you have good days and bad days, but I don’t think that is the reason for my frustration…

Have you ever had to do something because you have to, but it takes every bit of your being to make yourself do it?  In my case it is a job, but I guess it could be anything in your life.  Seeing relatives you know don’t like you, but you know you have to make an appearance and be nice to them anyway?  I’m sure everyone has that one branch of the family you wish would fall off the tree and get thrown in the chipper machine.  Well, that might be a little extreme, maybe just picked up off the curb by the trash/brush truck.  A social or work shindig that you are “expected” to be at, even though they act like it’s not a big deal.  But, if you don’t show up you will hear about it on Monday.  Those things we do because we are adults and know that there are things we have to do that we may not like, but it is our responsibility to do it.  Not only do you have to do it, but you have to act like you are enjoying yourself, putting on that fake smile, making small talk, and thinking the whole time that you wished the smoke alarms would go off so you would have an excuse to leave.

The problem with having clinical depression is that you spend your life performing this balancing act of trying to show the world your “good self.”  The self that stays upbeat or smiles, puts on that show that everything is wonderful in the world, even though inside you just want to jump out of your own skin.  You feel like one more day of this job, or one more event or family get together, or whatever your trigger is, you are going to hit your last straw, last nerve, last whatever and then it will all come apart and it won’t be pretty.  The thing is once it gets to that point, not only do you scare yourself, you scare those around you, as they are wondering what is wrong with you.  What the heck happened for you to be acting like this, and usually they have no clue at all.  There are some whose family will call them drama queens, overly excitable, Debbie Downers, or whatever label they can come up with to explain your behavior.  Mine family just knows this is me, every once in a while I lose it, but give me time and I will be back to my old, happy self… Most people with deep depression are good actors. They put on a good front, but inside they are being held together with fraying ropes that are going to come apart any minute, that one last pull and the house of cards will collapse and they worry whether they will be able to come back from this time or is the house beyond repair.

I normally try to make my posts funny or lighthearted, but for some reason this one went to the dark side.  I know I’ve been hanging onto a job because most people would feel I would be dumb to resign, but if I don’t I’m not sure how much longer I can go before things get ugly… and that isn’t a place I really want to be.

If you are frustrated, depressed, feeling hopeless, not knowing where to turn, there are resources out there.  Find them, talk to someone, do something before you hit the abyss and can’t find your way out.  I promise my next post will be on something happier, like “the girls,” of which mine are probably to the age and size they should be called “the women,” but that just sound as good.  Till next time…

I see it has been a while since my last post.  I do mean well though.  I think about posting, as there isn’t a day that goes by that there isn’t something to write about.  I mean the presidential election this year is going to be very interesting. Currently, I know who I’m not voting for, but have no idea who I am going to vote for.  I am looking strongly at the Libertarian candidate, as I consider myself an independent.  I vote for the person and the type of job I feel they will do, not what party they are.  The problem is that there really isn’t much difference between the Republicans and the Democrats to a point.  They say different things, but when it comes time to take action, you normally end up with the same thing.   Lies, broken promises, and wondering what has happened to our great country, the USA.  No matter how bad things look over here though, you would be hard pressed to find a country that is better to live in.  We still have freedom of speech, freedom to worship or not worship as we please, decide who to marry and how many children we want, and a whole host of other freedoms.  There are certain countries where if you said one bad word against the president or leader you would be killed or thrown in a locked cell never to be seen again.  If you were in their country illegally you sure wouldn’t be able to protest on the streets talking about what rights you should have.  First off, you probably wouldn’t want anyone to know you are there illegally and the minute they find out you of course will be either deported, jailed, or killed in the streets.   But, that wasn’t where I was going with this post…

You could also talk about the police shootings, racial tensions, all the acts of violence that are happening not only here but around the world, but that isn’t what I want to talk about.  I guess what is really bugging me right now is Facebook and social media.  I guess social media in general just has me baffled.  The other day I was told I was too dumb for words by a person I barely knew.  Don’t even think she was one of my friends, but I blocked her anyway.  All I had done was post a meme about gun control, which she took completely out of context and there you go.

I then had a Pastor who I have known for years up and block me because I didn’t agree with his politics.  First of all, why is a pastor telling me how to vote?  Not suggesting or saying the pros and cons of the situation, but that we have to have Hillary as president, Obama was the best president we have every had and Michelle Obama was a better first lady than even Jackie Kennedy… That last part really upset me.  But, what we got the most crossways over was how he felt like he could post all types of memes about how all white people are racist, we hate Obama because he is black, and other let’s hate all whites sort of items.  If you haven’t guessed it yet, he is a black pastor, of whom I was part of his church for a long time.  I told him first off I don’t hate Obama, I just don’t like his politics and what he has done for America.  I also try very hard to not see color, but after having all this race rhetoric thrown at me, it makes it very hard not to.  I guess when he posted for all to see that my husband had become loony and needed to get back on his meds just because he didn’t agree with the pastor, I finally had to tell him like it was.  Of course, we are both now blocked from his page, which is probably best.

The problem with social media is that for some reason people will say anything they want to you and about you because you are not face to face.  They can hide behind their computer screen, say anything they want, and then when things get too heated they can either block you, erase the posts, or just sign off.  I couldn’t imagine being a young person now, as I remember getting bullied and made fun of in school, but once you got home you could forget about it.  They didn’t have an easy way to communicate with you, and that was that.  Today, you can’t get away from them.  The bullies find you on social media and then harass you.  If you block them they will make a different screen name, get you to become friends, and then turn on you that way.  Someone can take a picture of you in a compromising situation and then blast it to everyone through texts or messenger.  It is just mind blowing.  I have told several people that if it wasn’t for wanting to keep up with my kids and friends, I would just close my Facebook account, but then I would lose out on my ability to communicate with them, and that would mean the bullies would win, and that is not an option.  I have come to the point where I try to post only cute and funny things so I don’t have to worry about the backlash… You know, pick your battles sort of thing.

But all that aside, my main focus right now is to finally start focusing on writing fiction.  I know I have been talking about this for a while, at least 3 years, but this year I turn a speed limit on August 1, you know the speed no one can drive?  55….  So, it is time to either start writing or move on to something else… Is there something in your life you have wanted to do, but just haven’t started or gave up on it?  Maybe it is time you take inventory of what you really want to do in this life before it is too late… As life does seem to go faster the older you get and before you know it you’re at the end…. Till next time….

a-ha-ha-wr-be-a-writer-funny1We are now on week 2 of my month of writing in May and my first week went to heck in a hand basket…  I didn’t get but 2 short stories wrote, 1 blog post, and nothing else… Today I have to step back, shake myself off, and try again.  There is no way to make up for last week, but I can still complete my writing goals from today on.  That is the thing about dreams… You have to put in the work to take them from the dream stage to reality.  I could get all upset, and beat myself up over not making my goals, but instead of worrying about it, I have to stop and regroup.  See if I am really chasing the correct dream or did I just let life get in the way.  Sometimes you start down a road of what you believe your calling is, or your dream, and get halfway down the road and realize you have no desire to follow this path at all.  I don’t mean you are just tired, but you decide you have no desire at all to even do it.  Sometimes what we think are roadblocks and obstacles are really landmines we have laid ourselves to keep from doing what we really aren’t wanting to do to begin with.

This isn’t always the problem.  A lot of the time you really want to follow a certain dream, but life really does get in the way.  When that happens you can’t just stop, but rearrange things, make a daily schedule, do whatever you need to do to make sure you have some time every day to work on your dream.  If you only have 15 minutes then use that time to write a chapter, a drabble, or whatever you need to do.  If you are an artist in 15 minutes you could sketch a character, cut out a pattern, sew something, or at least get your ideas on paper so when you have more time you don’t have to think about what to do, as you have already made the blueprint to follow.  Sometimes I find it helpful to write down before I go to bed what I want to accomplish the next day, a question about how to proceed in a story I’m writing, or just for clarity in how to get through the next day.  When you write this down your subconscious will be working on the problem while you sleep and normally when you wake up you will have your answer, or an idea, or you even had a dream that showed you what to do.  This doesn’t always work, but you would be surprised how much clarity you can get when you do this.

The thing is, most of us do waste time every day on things that do not bring us closer to our goals, but just wastes time.  I admit my biggest bad habit is watching TV.  Once I start a show I have to see what happens.  I am going to sit there until the end, as I don’t want to spend the rest of the day or evening trying to figure out what happened.  I watched the finale of The Good Wife Sunday night.  I have been watching this show since episode one and was totally vested in how they were going to end the show.  They said fans would be happy with the ending.  They said things would be tied up and nothing left to the imagination.  Well they LIED to me… I still don’t understand the ending.  The only ending that really upset me more was the series finale of The Sopranos.  That ending still pisses me off.  I also hate it when they leave a series in a cliffhanger and then decide not to renew it, so here we are years later still wondering what happened… i.e. did they stay together, did she lose the baby, who did she pick, did they both die?  I mean I could go on for pages about the shows I watched to the last episode, got into the cliffhanger, and to this day never found out what happened.  This is a big problem when you have a writer’s or creative mind is you will mull over all types of endings and what could have happened and you are just never completely satisfied.

But getting back on track here… I am going to have to get myself back on track if I have any intention on becoming a writer who makes money from my words.  For those of you who are reading this, it is time you regroup and figure out what you are supposed to be doing in your life.  What makes you happy.  What makes you want to get out of bed every morning and get to work… Also, are you hanging onto a dream that if you really are honest with yourself was never your dream to begin with, it was just a way to make money, or your family said you should be this or that, or you just thought it sounded cool and decided that was your goal in life.  Take inventory on your desires.  If need be do a pros and cons list where you take a piece of paper and draw a line own the center.  One side you write pros and other side you write cons.  Once you did that honestly write down why you should follow this dream and why you should not.  Why you think it is right and why you think you made a mistake.  Once done take a minute and really look at what you wrote, as normally you will see the answer…. Till next time…

mothers-day-card-pride-mom-funny-ecard-XYLIn the early 1900s a lady called Anna Jarvis was the reason we have Mother’s Day today.  In wanting to honor her mother who worked to clean up and sanitize the make shift hospitals and such during the Civil War.  Most women stayed home and took care of kids, not volunteering to improve the health of the soldiers.  Through Anna’s efforts to honor her mom, she ended up getting the US Government to authorize the holiday so all mothers could be honored by their children for their hard work and love for their kids.  The problem was Mother’s Day ended up this very commercialized holiday that made it more about what the kids spent on the present then really honoring their mom through spending time with them.  If your kids didn’t go out and spend a bunch of money on you then you must be a bad mother, which is part of where I believe the depression comes from related to Mother’s Day.  The thing is Anna got so upset that she started petitioning, picketing, and protesting the government to stop the holiday, as it didn’t mean what it did originally, it became more of a guilt trip on kids who either were unable to or did not buy a big gift or fancy dinner for their mom.  The sad thing is Anna spent all her money on trying to stop Mother’s Day as we know it.  Her true feelings were expressed in her quote:

A printed card means nothing except that you are too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone in the world. And candy! You take a box to Mother—and then eat most of it yourself. A pretty sentiment.

— Anna Jarvis.

While others profited from the day, Jarvis did not, and she spent the later years of her life with her sister Lillie whom she had taken care of for years. In 1943, she began organizing a petition to rescind Mother’s Day.  However, these efforts were halted when she was placed in the Marshall Square Sanitarium in West Chester, Pennsylvania, broke and with dementia.  People connected with the floral and greeting card industries paid the bills to keep her in the sanitarium. She ultimately died in 1948.  The committee she formed tried to stay together after her death, but finally disbanded.  Anna Jarvis never married nor did she have any children, which is a bit of irony as she was the reason for Mother’s Day and she never was a mother.

I do believe the problem with Mother’s Day is the same problem with most of the other holidays, there is this expectation of what everyone should do or expect, and when reality hits the depression sets in.  Let’s say you are a mom, but your kids are older and basically just call or such, you then wonder what you did to be such a bad mom that they didn’t feel compelled to do more for you.  You then have Christmas with the gift giving and the crap that goes with that.  Of course you have Valentine’s Day and the expectations that come from that, no big gift so the person must not really love me.  I read somewhere that the day after Valentine’s you will find the most traffic from women looking for a new guy on one of the many dating websites, including the married looking for married type.

With all this said, people need to stop having such big expectations for these commercialized holidays.  Most holidays were not started as a reason to give a bunch gifts or such, they were started to honor an event, a person, or a group of people.  Whether it be veterans, mothers, dads, and Jesus, the reason for the season needs to come first, not the expectations given to a person through the constant bombarding of commercials on TV, radio ads, or even surfing the web.  We all need to remember it isn’t the gift that is given, but the thought behind it…  Till next time….

 

The month of May has become my month to get my writing on track.  Not only is the first week Book-in-a-Week.com, but the entire month of May is storyaday.org.  This is where you can setup your own rules, but you have to follow them, whether you write 31 stories for 31 days or a story a day for 5 days a week, or whatever, you need to follow your rules so you get into the habit of write daily, on a regular schedule.  This is the hard point for me.  I work a weird shift, try to work in enough sleep, and then I get scattered with everything else I need to do, so figuring out a writing schedule and sticking to it is a must for me.  Both events give you the ability to get a lot written, but the key is you aren’t writing a finished product.  You are getting the words on paper and then you will come back later and do clean up.  Some of the stories you write you will probably never look at again, but then others may clean up to become some your best work. 2016stadabadgesq500x500

What I find interesting is a short story can be as short as 25 words or less.  There is Twitter fiction where you have to fit the story in 144 characters.  You have drabbles that are about 100 words.  You could also do flash fiction which is normally between 500 to 1000 words.  The one thing you must follow is the story, no matter how short, must have a beginning, middle, and end.  The reader is not going to like you if you take them right to the cliff and then end the story.  They are going to wonder whether the main character jumped, turned back, sat down, or just disappeared, but for some people they may not read your stuff again because you just pissed them off.  I am one of those who hates open ended movies, as my mind goes in all sorts of directions trying to figure out how it should end, a week later I may still be trying to figure it out and just wish I had never seen the movie.

But getting on point, if you have a desire to become a writer or artist or whatever, you need to make a time every day to practice, even if it is 5 minutes here or there.  I carry both a sketchbook and writing notebook in my purse everywhere I go so if I find myself having to wait somewhere or such I can pull out what I need and get some work done.  It also helps if you can find something like the book in a week group or something related to what you are trying to do, so you can have accountability, focus, and encouragement to make the time and start turning your dream into actuality.  Till next time…

%d bloggers like this: